Girls Don’t Exist on the Intertubes

Your host Holly here, bringing walls of text and stupid posts the likes of which have never been seen before on the internet! For all ten of you reading this, thank you. So yes, here is a post I’ll try to crosspost at Pink Pigtail Inn (heart you Larisa!)

In a World, a World Where Girl Gamers Exist.

Disclaimer: This post contains adult language, sexual comments, and a severe lack of cookies. If you are easily offended by any of these, please do not continue and wait for the next family friendly post. Rated Arrr by a Pirate.

Now that that’s out of the way, one topic that’s been bothering me, and that’s how different being a girl in World of Warcraft can be. I can say from experience you can tell the people that assume you’re a guy, and the people that assume your a girl, the difference in reaction of someone that assumed you were a guy and learned you were a girl. But first, I have stereotyped (flame wars begin!) the 3 types of girls I personally have ran into in World of Warcraft, now please remember these are just general classifications and there are a lot of grey areas, but were I to post grey areas, I’d have to list every girl I know in World of Warcraft, that’s why we have generalizations! Anyway, back on topic.

The 4 Major Types of Gamer Girls I’ve Encountered in World of Warcraft (Including me!)

Girl Archetype 1: “I’ve got boobs, give me stuff.” – I’m sure everyone knows or sees this kind of girl, the one that plays up the fact she’s a woman, has boobs, and thus doesn’t actually have to be skilled at the game (though she may be) but expects every sex starved male to shower her with epics, runs, gold, etc. . . It’s usually pretty to identify these, because in the first four lines they’ll mention their boobs, someone in WoW that has given her stuff, and/or gloating about that WoW boyfriend that she recently got rid of.

Personally, this is the archetype I despise most. Gender is certainly not a valid excuse for getting anything easier or cheaper (cheap as free!) I often try to call out these people, as I personally hate having someone like this in or associating with my guild, my raid, etc. . . because all they do in the end is drag it down, making someone waste -their- time on a girl because zomg! She’s a girl.

Girl Archetype 2: “What do you mean I was standing in the fire, you’re just saying that because I’m a woman.” - To me this is the type of girl who gets offended at the slightest remark about their gaming as a direct challenge to their sexuality, tell them they were standing in the fire, they try to turn it into basically sexual harassment. “You only say that because I’m a girl” “You only care because I’m a girl.” When handed something free (that the guild is probably giving everyone (gems, enchants, etc. . .) they turn even that into something derogatory. “You can’t buy me, I’m not a prostitute”

For the most part I find I really really feel sorry for these women, who feel completely challenged in everything they can do that they’re paranoid that everything revolves around their vagina. Often times I’ve found that when you get to know them, you learn of a bad history, sometimes with rape, molestation, etc. . . though not always. Yet these women definitely have a reason for feeling so challenged all of the time, and for that you should really try to find out and maybe help them understand that you treat them that way because they’re a person and no reason more.

Girl Archetype 3: “Yes I suck, but I only play because my boyfriend/girlfriend does.” - I’m sure we’ve all met this type of woman, the one only playing for something to do with their significant other, usually sneaking into your raid, or guild by being the significant other of the raid/guild leader. They may suck, in more ways than one, I label them ‘drama time bombs.’ because for whatever reason, when you finally call o ut they suck, they give their partner stupid, stupid ultimatums, shatter guilds, run away good people, raids collapse, all due to one person because they have sex or cyber sex with someone in your group.

Girl Archetype 4: “Awesome, downed Sindragosa with 4 people afk, while eating a cookie, oh by the way I’m a girl.” – I think this is the most common type of female player out there, the kind that don’t hide the fact they’re a girl, are calm and relaxed about it, enjoying the game and only remembering or adding they’re a girl as an afterthought. Gamers at heart you often find these to be the best gamers, most excited, and most oblivious to your come-ons. I like to think Larisa and I fall into this category.

For Every Action There is an Equal but Opposite Reaction.

Now that I’ve discussed the archetypes of female gamers I’ve met, now the down and dirty about how we find we’re treated in everyday World of Warcraft. I have to say that for the most part, the only real difference I get, besides the occasional stalker (*shudder*) is just a more welcoming attitude. I’m not sure if this is real or imagined, but it seems that when a guild, a raid, a group learns your a girl, they’re more welcoming and open. Not to the point it makes a huge difference, just a noticeable one.

The other big difference I’ve noticed is that at least my raid, seems to have the goal at seeing if they can keep a girl blushing the entire raid from sexual jokes, innuendo, and puns (in specific our raid leader.) I usually counter with ones that make them do a double take. You have to remember though, my guild is named Guilty so jokes about anal sex, oral sex, and polishing staves is very common place.

Personally, while I do enjoy extra attention sometimes, I actually dislike the thought I’m being treated differently, not for my skill, my personality, or my ability to make terrible posts that make your eyes bleed, but for the fact I have boobs. I do think girl gaming is different, because there -is- a fundamental difference in genders and their reactions, it is not the rule, but that doesn’t mean in the end it’s different enough to warrant different expectations.